BOldlY GoiNg wHeRe No OnE hAS GoNe BeFoRe…

 

 

Hello readers!! Please excuse my hiatus, I was out of town this weekednd. I went to a leadership conference in the ATL. I had a great time and learned alot about myself. Two Three main things I brought back with me:

1. Be bold, don’t be afraid to stand out.

2. If you think you can or you can’t….You are absolutely right.

3. Never try to flat iron your afro, especially when the humidity is 80% and it’s 95+ degrees outside. (long story)

In today’s society, everybody wants to be somebody. That’s a good thing right? No. The problem is,  the person they want to be is not themselves. People want to be someone else. I’ve done it too. I’ve thought to myself…I want hair like Beyonce, azz like Kim K, eyes like Erykah B. That’s not original at all, it’s bland. I want to be bold.When you are making soup, you don’t only put in carrots, you put in potatoes, and celery, and all kinds of stuff, that’s what makes it taste good, all of the different ingredients. That’s what makes the world a wonderful place, Uniqueness!!! Boldness is about making your own mark, not tracing around someone elses. Don’t be some cookie cutter type of person. I was determine to do so at this conference. When they played ‘Cupid Shuffle’ (MY JAM!!!) I jumped up and danced, when they said scream I did, and when they started handing out scholarship money I got the highest amount. I didn’t write any essays, do any interview, just enjoyed myself. Yep, it pays to be yourself.  With boldness lies freedom. When you accept yourself completely, there’s no more pretending, just enjoying…yourself. What a relief !!!!. Variety is the spice of life, which is why all of my friends are almost the opposite of me. No one wants to hang out with copy cat, somebody says and does exactly what they do. Its so much easier to just LOVE YOURSELF. So do it. Be bold in everything you do.

Peace and Love

Good Girl

So The Hell WhAT!!!

 

I was just sitting here in my office pondering how for so long people have been stripping me of my blackness. Since when does having different tastes transform you into a different race? “You’re an oreo, black on the outside and white on the inside.” WTF!! When I think about the things that I’m fond of I don’t think of it as black or white. Who CARES?!! Yeah, I’m a black chick and so what if I listen to Bon Jovi, Maroon 5 and U2!!! I like it!! That doesn’t mean I don’t still like to hip hop. So what if I like to wear my flip flops with everything!!!! SO!!! So what if when I talk, it makes sense and I pronounce all of the syllables? That’s how you’re supposed to speak!!! And Hell Yeah I like Sushi!! But that don’t make me Chinese!! Since grade school I have been dealing with this foolishness. It boggles my mind how a black person can be stripped of their blackness in the blink of a dry eye, but a white person or any person for that matter would never be race raped like that. This is not a race rant, this is purely an account of my own experiences as a black woman who didn’t struggle, never lived in a inner city, and doesn’t talk ebonics or whatever the hell it is. NEWS FLASH!:ALL BLACK PEOPLE DON’T COME FROM THE HOOD!!!! Sooo that means my blackness is invalid? I don’t get much of this ignorance from white people, but I do from other black people. Just because the struggle isn’t the same between me an others doesn’t make me a sell out or a snob, IT MAKES ME A SELL UP because I’m trying get to higher ground and because I don’t choose to represent the african american race ignorantly!!! Come on people [if it does not apply to you, don't mind] ELEVATE YOUR MIND!!! On the otherhand, if the fact that I want to express myself the way I choose means I can’t be a black chick, than I’d rather be freakin’ orange!!

Peace and Love

Good Girl

I GoTTa PoCkeT FuLL oF SuNshiNE!!!

 

I was writing this other blog for today, but it was bringing me down, and getting way to deep…sooo I quit it. Dawning on me is the fact that I have sooo many things to just be happy and joyous about. You should to!!! Make a list, Here goes. So many people waste time thinking about whats wrong with their lives that they forget about what’s beautifully right!!

1. I AM ALIVE!! surely everyone reading this can appreciate that!!!

2. I HAVE JOB!!!! If you have a job, any job, be grateful, even the strippers.lol

3. I have a home, with a bed, and some food!!! okay , okay, so what it’s not gourmet, nor is my bed sealy posturepedic, that’s fine with mel!!

4. I can do what I want, when I want!!! I’m free to do as I please… life’s good!

5. I don’t have any kids!!! Hell freakin’ yeah, no offense to the mothers/ babymama’s but, it’s not for everyone at least not for me at this time. I have 300 other kids though, they come in pairs and they go on my feet.

6. I’m young and Fab!!! No explanation necessary!!

That’s just skimming the surface. It could be better, but it also could be a whole lot worse. Appreciate what you have. Appreciate what you don’t have too.

Be Happy!!! Sheesh!!,

Good Girl

You Gotta Do Something…

 

This past Sunday’s sermon was called “You Gotta Do Something”, the pastor went on to say that life’s opportunities aren’t falling out of the sky, you have to climb a latter and be prepared to reach for them when they are lowered down. It wasn’t until yesterday that it became clear to me that I wasn’t doing all that I could do in order to reach the opportunities in certain areas of my life. For example, I’ve had this internship for about ten weeks and I have about 3 or 4 more weeks to go. Usually, my days weren’t very eventful, I would mostly just watch people, complete my projects with lightning speed, research on the computer (a little more than I should’ve), and work on my intern presentation. One day my boss’s boss came to check in on me, and it kind of gave me the impression that he thought that I wasn’t keeping busy. I was a little insulted but it was just what I needed. I always tell myself that I’m an over-doer and I work the hardest but in actuality, I could be doing more. I pride myself in getting out there and being self motivated but I had fallen into stagnation…I was becoming a slacker. I talked to my dad later that day and he told me that it shouldn’t take someone being on your back for you to go and do something. What made me feel even worse about the matter, a friend and I had had an argument over lunch a few days ago about taking the initiative to take on work. I told him that his theory sounded stupid, but I was the one being stupid. It made me feel embarrassed because I would never see myself that way but it was true, I was being lazy and waiting for work when I should’ve been fighting for something to do. So today that’s what I did, and I have found that finding something to do yourself is way better than  someone telling you what to do. Even if you aren’t doing a whole lot, PERCEPTION IS KEY!!! Walking around with a pen and paper looks good. When people hire employees they are looking for the one that can be the most efficient with the least amount of supervision. They really don’t want to have to breathe down your neck. I had to check myself, sometimes the views of ourselves get distorted but that is natural because we are on the inside looking out. Then we just    re-evaluate,re-juvenate, and KEEP IT MOVING!!! That’s what I love about life, it’s never to late to change especially for the better. YOU GOTTA DO SOMETHING!!!

peace and love

Good Girl

Grace and Mercy…

 

Today I feel like I have been blessed with two sisters one named grace and the other mercy. Often times we take for granted all of the things that God lets us miss, or lets us get away with… Today I’ve gotten a big visual of that, So I just want to publicly thank Him for his grace and mercy in my life, my finances, my health, and my safety. Thank You Lord.

Mercy allows you to continue on in sin; grace empowers you to overcome it. –Jacquelyn K. Heasley

Grace and Mercy,

Good Girl

Save the Drama For Ya MaMa!!!

 

Usually in a group of friends there are token characters… the perfectionist, the drama queen, the practically married, and I could go on and on. All of the different friends balance each other out, but not in my case. I feel like all I have in my circle are drama queens, and lately all of the phone calls I get are girls crying, or cursing or fussing about some guy in their life. Geeez Louise!!! Is there anyone who is happy about anything right now? I just want to be happy and hang with my girls and go shopping like the other billion chicks on earth but that seems impossible cause none of my homies are in a position to do so. I’m tired of counseling my friends about drama that could totally be controlled if they just make a few good decisions. It’s kinda like they get their kicks from being a drama queen, and the center of attention. I’ve gotten to a point where I don’t have anyone to turn to with my issues because they have so many of their own that they have nothing to say that could help me. So here I am hold everything inside. I know girls have issues (a lot of issues) but damn we occasionally take breaks from the dramatics and just live. What’s a girl to do when you feel alone in a group of friends or you have a friend that you keep telling the same thing to over and over and OVER AGAIN!!!! what a waste of breath!!! Do you continue to tell her over and over or do you keep it to yourself?

Peace and Love,

Good Girl

Last Night…

Sooo I went out last night… Not really, I just picked up a couple of girlfriends of mine and we got some    Mc Donalds (far from the sushi I’d hoped for).I thought I would go out, but there was absolutely nothing going on except some LAME house parties near my campus full of wanna be players and scrubs. Needless to say the parties always get shut down by the campus flashlight cops around 12:30am. If all else fails, go to your BF’s house… so that’s what I did, a little eye candy is good for you. So much for Fantastic Friday. However, I haven’t lost all hope, today’s Super Saturday! Although I know that it too will be filled with wanna be’s that have no game and continue to try and give you the same old lines…It wont hurt to try and enjoy the rapid weekend once more…

 

 

Wanna Be: What’s up? What’s your name?

Chick: Lina, what’s yours?

Wanna Be: D

Chick: No, I mean what’s the name your mother gave you..

Wanna Be: Oh… Derrick

Chick: Ok… (crickets chirping)

Wanna Be: So what ya’ll gettin’ into tonight?

Chick: Nothing, I’m about to go home.

Wanna Be: We bout head to my apartment, you and your girl(s) should come…

Chick: ( yeah right) Nah… I gotta work tomorrow… ( lol. don’t even have a job)

Wanna Be: You gotta man?

Chick: Yeah…(code for ‘don’t ask me for my number’)

Wanna Be: Can you have friends? (code for ‘I don’t give a damn)

Chick: Sure… (damn he’s gonna ask anyway!)

Wanna Be: Well can I get your number so I can call you sometime?

Chick: I’ll get yours, what is it?

Wanna Be: 123-456-7890

Chick: What’s your name again? (proof that she hasn’t been listening to a damn thing he said)

Wanna Be: D

Afterwards, the number is thrown into the icy abyss of “No Call”.  So sad… NOT !!!!

Peace and Love,

Good Girl

Country Girl, City Heart…

 

What a joyous day !It’s Friday, and I’m looking forward to having some  Apple Martini’s and California rolls with my girls tonight. Although there aren’t many places to choose from in ‘Huntsvegas’ Alabama, I’m sure that I’ll find something to get into. Downtown is my savior, Mason’s, Sammy T’s, Crossroads, Monaco, and oh yeah Ketchup or whatever it’s called…one of em’ will do. Sometimes I wish I lived in a bigger city, one where I would always have fun at my fingertips no matter what time of day or night, but I don’t, so I kinda enjoy the bigger places vicariously through other bloggers. I read about their nights at posh clubs and lounges, and their encounters with celebs with such envy. I wish I could be there, but sometimes I wonder if a small-medium town girl like me could handle the hustle and bustle of a huge city. Maybe it would change me from this smiling southern girl to a frowning subway riding jerk. I try to experience different things but there’s nothing like seeing all kinds of people from different places, trying to do the same thing…survive. It was such an experience to go to NYC, NY last year. It was life changing for a country girl like myself. I was right in the center at the Raddison Martinique on Broadway. It was something totally different than what I’m used to but I felt right at home. It was more like the socialite scene that I consider myself to be a part of. As for now, I’m still in Alabama, so I’ll just pretend I’m there while I sip my Cosmo. Happy Friday Folks!!!

Peace and Love,

Country Girl, City Heart

Stop being a Judge Judy!!!!!

 

 

 

Sooo, my friend is pregnant, the last thing I’d expect from her cause we always would pride ourselves on never being “baby mama’s”, but Lawyers, Engineers and wives to distinguished men. I remember working with this one girl, we’ll call Shortie, (last summer) and being unmoved by the fact that she was soooo joyed to be a pregnant, as a matter of fact, my BFF blasted on her when she told everyone, told her that her life was over and all that. Shortie became so embarassed about being prego that she started to deny it. Now she (my BFF) is prego, HOW effin’ ironic. It happens to the best of us. Now that I think about last summers drama, I kind of admire Shortie now, she wore her shyt like a real woman, yeah she was prego, but she wasn’t about to let the peanut gallery, disturb the true joy that comes with being a mother. People are so quick to judge others based on their own belief systems. We are all guilty of this. We ask questions, and make judgements… “I wouldn’t be happy about being preg”, “Why does she date him?”, “Her outfit is ghetto”…People make numerous comments about the lives of others not realizing that THAT SCREAMS INSECURITY. If the first thing you think about when you see something or someone is negative, that maybe a sign that you have personal hang-ups that you may need to address. It only takes about ten seconds to take a different view and try to understand why they do things the way they do, and if you don’t understand…WHO GIVES A DAMN IT’S THEIR LIFE!!! I too can be a Negative Nancy/JUDGE JUDY sometimes, but I TRY to keep it Positive Patty mode. Usually , I get exactly what I want, and I’m drama-free when I’m Positive Patty. People, bosses, teachers, boyfriends, parents…. Everyone responds better to her. I don’t feel the need to be all “IN YO FACE!!!” to get things done, but what can I say, some people don’t have the mental capacity to be either or, niether nor.  

Positivity is the BFF of Prosperity, If you become her friend , she’ll introduce you to him, and you won’t be friends with Mrs. Drama anymore. Life has enough stressors on it’s own I don’t see the need for outside hot messes and never understood why some people live for it. I other words… IF YOU GET ON MY SAILBOAT AND IT STARTS TO SINK, YOU GOTTA GET YOUR AZZ OFF!!!!! I don’t need people with drama-filled lives bring ‘hot-messes-fresh-out-of-the-oven’, to my door step. Approaching is a NEW semester, with NEW opportunites, and a NEW mind set and the only ones invited are peolple who are headed to the same destination, so if you not feelin’ me, this is your stop to get off my HaPPyNess TRaiN!!!

Peace and Love,

goodgirl

Loosing the Fire…

“Hey how are you doing?”… a phrase that many people always ask but really don’t want to know. I usually answer with the proper, dry “Fine, and you?”. I have had a heck of a morning already. I started this internship with a fire like I never had, but now I am struggling with consistency. When I first started I had to be to work at 7:30 am, and I was doing really good arriving 15 or 20 minutes earlier, then I dwindled down to 10 minutes, then 5 minutes, then I’m walking in the door at exactly 7:30. I hate that, I want my fire back. Today I actually woke up at 7:07!!!! That started this domino effect. I rushed to do my hair (which is a no, no cause I rock the natural)…excuse me my afro!! So I’m looking like a dummy with two ponys on each side. Then I find some random shirt to put on, and I’m running out of my apartment just after I grab a TV dinner, a peach, plum, bottled water and a bag of chips and throw all of them into a wal-mart bag. Needless to say, that probably took the most time, cause a sista gotta eat. But anyway, I jump into my little car and fly like peter pan, but wait!!! There’s more, drum roll please!! I get pullled over!!! OMG!!!! I start to grab all my info and stuff, but the guy was just like slow down, and I’m like thanks for nothing, but I was overcome with the joy of not getting a ticket so I totally got over it. So I get there ten minutes late, with the guilt to match, and instead of going to my office to collect myself I head straight to my morning duties, after I got done, I went to my office to check my emails and stuff and felt this wondeful rush as I remembered that July 4th was a holiday and I don’t have to work. I can catch up on some most needed rest that I deprive myself of every night talking on my cell phone like the rest of the world.

As I ponder further about my chaotic morning, I come to the conclusion that everything that happened could have been controlled. There are so many things that people can control in their lives but don’t. I could have controlled staying up all night and talking on my cell, but I didn’t, so that made me hit the ’snooze’ button, which made me wake up at 7:07, which made me rush to fix myself and my lunch up , which made me drive over the speed limit, which made me get pulled over, which made me extra late for work. In the future, I intend to start controlling the things that I can, especially because I don’t enjoy the aggravation of this domino effect. One thing leads to another, and another thing leads to something else. I am going to get my fire back. So what are you gonna do?

Peace and Love,

GoodGirlGoneMad